The Bible: Out with the Old, in with the New

One testament down, one to go and boy I'll tell you they didn't make those last books a walk in the park. The old testament seems to be made up of four different kinds of content:

1. Crazy stories
2. Informative instructions
3. Historical accounts
4. "Beautiful Hebrew poetry"

1 and 3 are by far the most interesting parts, 2 can be kind of funny but whenever I run into a book that's prefaced by "Book x is regarded as some of the best Hebrew poetry" I know I'm in for a snore. You know what does not translate well to English? Hebrew poetry. These last few books are full of it too. The poetry just comes of as a mess of words describing some vague prophecies. 'Israel will be destroyed because it is so sinful. Then the LORD god will build it up again because he's such a peach.' x 50. These prophets are all crazy doomsayers. Those people who stand at street corners preaching the end of the world were born at the wrong time. Back in ancient Israel they named a book after you.

Jonah is the only prophet worth mentioning. I liked that he didn't want to be a prophet plus there was a little bit of content 1 with the whole eaten by a whale thing. There's some bizarre metaphor about gourds at the end that just left me kind of confused but that aside it was a pretty good story. There was even some actual examples of god being a forgiving guy instead of the usual jerk.

Proverbs was one of my favorite book. It's essentially just a list of advice [supposedly] from King Solomon.
It ranged from good and useful:
"If you stop learning you will forget what you already know"

"The start of an argument

    is like a water leak—

    so stop it before

    real trouble breaks out."

to ridiculous:

'Don’t be so lazy that you say,

    “If I go to work,

    a lion will eat me!”'

...but at least still somewhat relevant

Song of Solomon was a weird one. It was like someone just wanted to stick their love poem in the middle of the bible. The version I'm reading justified it by saying the whole thing was a metaphor for the love God has for his people. You can be the judge of that

SoS 4:5

Your breasts are perfect; they are twin deer feeding among the lilies

SoS 8:10

I am a wall around a city, my breasts are towers

Read a little bit into the New Testament but only half way through the first book. Jesus contradicts a lot of the stuff in the OT but is constantly claiming to be reinforcing it. 

"You know that you have been taught, “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” But I tell you not to try to get even with a person who has done something to you. When someone slaps your right cheek,^[i] turn and let that person slap your other cheek."

That eye for an eye stuff was straight from Moses. Ned Flanders once said "I've done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff!"  You really can't win here, what parts of the bible are you really supposed to follow. Does Jesus trump everything in OT? Ah well, NT is pretty interesting so far. This is probably the best approximation out there

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1tg46ScP8w&t=1m47s

As you may or may not have read on my Facebook, last weekend I won a Magic tournament. Well actually I split first with another player. After 7 hours of magic you're just about ready to mentally collapse and splitting first and second place prizes up between the finalists can be a welcome event. I beat the other guy earlier in the tournament but I was ready to go home.
Between first and second the prizes were:
$250
3 SCG Open points
24 booster packs
1 entry to an SCG Invitational in Atlanta or LA

Now Atlanta and LA are a long ways away and neither of us were really planning on going. I offered him $150 of the $250 if I got the invite/extra point and he agreed. 25 bucks for a unique prize like that seemed worth it even if I was iffy about going.

This is what I'm getting myself into by the way
http://www.starcitygames.com/pages/open_series/#invitational

Now I'm here with that invite burning a hole through my magic bag and I have to wonder how I could not go? As yet I haven't gone to a giant tournament like that and I've been putting off the experience due to work and other commitments. Now I have more excuses than ever: money, time, vacation days but more than ever this seems like one of those cases where you can do nothing or you can do something. I doubt that nothing is ever the correct action.

I'd like to book my ticket soon but I do have one thing holding me back. I don't want to do all this by myself. An all day magic event like this is draining and it'd be really nice to have an ally there with me. I'm fairly sure I can get Brendan to go but I've yet to get a firm commitment.

64th place is $250 which is probably enough to cover the trip. I might as well just win if I'm going to make the trip though, y'know? 1st place is $15000, if I win it all I might be able to justify all the money I've spent on this game up until this point. Sounds good.

The Bible: When Animals Attack!

Just finished up Samuel 2 and Kings 1 & 2. For those unfamiliar, these books tend to focus on David and Solomon's rule over the nation of Israel. Kings goes on to describe the rule of all kings of Israel/Judah up until Nebuchadnezzer of Babylon conquers the area and sends the jews into exile. The books are mostly filled with wars against Syria, Egypt, and every other surrounding area you can think of. Sometimes when not at war against another nation they're at war with themselves. All in all the whole thing was fairly ridiculous. It comes off like a history text that people stuffed the LORD into. Oh the the Israelites got conquered? They must have pissed off God. They got back their land? The king must have done some serious Yahweh ass kissing. The prophets Elisha and Elijah were the most interesting part to me. They had a little more mystique than the list of kings.

I'm about a quarter of the way through now and I'm going to skip Chronicles since it looks like it's basically a clip show. I guess I'll be checking out Ezra next

Favorite Quotes:

2 Kings 17:25

"When they first lived there, they did not worship the Lord; so he sent lions among them and they killed some of the people."

1 Kings 20:35

"By the word of the Lord one of the sons of the prophets said to his companion, “Strike me with your weapon,” but the man refused.

So the prophet said, “Because you have not obeyed the Lord, as soon as you leave me a lion will kill you.” And after the man went away, a lion found him and killed him."

2 Kings 2:23-24

"From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys."

This conversation is 4-leaf over

JOB:
Still looking for a new job. I've had some good leads though a recruiter in the SE Michigan area. A company called Helm in Plymouth is apparently fairly interested in my background. I got a Linkedin message last week from a Google recruiter and after a quick phone screen it sounds like an interview is in the works. Once again, I have to ask where all these guys were when I was jobless a year ago? I guess a year of experience makes all the difference. Only problem with Google is location, it'd either be Chi-town or out Californy way. Given a choice between an AA job and a company like Google I have no idea what I'd pick.


OKC:
People on OKC can be off putting sometimes. I received this message after a little bit of back and forth.

"That's your goal by the week's end. You've gotta get yourself away from the computers sometime! I'd say there's more than "some" importance in looking around a little- it's critical. Whats so hustley and bustley about your life that you can't take a moment to go outside? A lunch break perhaps? I'll tell ya, if you can find a 4-leaf clover, bring it to a nice girl-- that's a sure fire way to impress, and a great way to start a conversation."


Ugh I can't even put my finger on it, this message is just really annoying to me. Thanks for the nag, Message you never.

ANDROID:
Going with the job search, I have to start doing more programming outside of work again. This might a be a programming exclusive thing but all recruiters I've met can't get enough of personal projects. I think I've got a decent idea for a mtg app and I know a couple of stores that might be interested in that sort of thing which would be a pretty cool in depth project. It's weird looking more at mobile again after having been off it for so long. My head is filled with SQL and whatever the hell powerbuilder is at work and it's refreshing to be back in the world of JAVA. As always, if you have a good app idea hit me up!

WEEKEND:
Last weekend I braved a walmart for the first time in over a year. I completely hated it in there (something about the lighting just makes me feel weird) but somehow I emerged unscathed with AA batteries, trash bags and a yoga mat. The mat came from a desire to exercise without stomping up and down on the floors and pissing off my so far understanding neighbour. Shit is tough, mostly I swear at the screen in poses that aren't terribly close to what the instructor is doing. I end up real sore the day after but it's definitely fun. I also played a lot of guitar over the weekend and learned some new songs. Mike, Ian, I seriously miss the jamming. Wherever hamreunion ends up, we must bring instruments.


BALTIMORA:
At work we have a quote board and after HamFrance I had to put up the quote "Jungle life, I'm far away from nowhere. On my own like Tarzan Boy." Somehow this lead to the in-office meme of answering all questions matter-of-factly with Baltimora. "Hey do you know where you run a recertification?" "Oh yes, I believe that would be Baltimora." "No way! Baltimora?!" "Baltimora!"

Get off my lawn

In the M:TG group I frequent on Facebook, people often ask if anyone has a card they're looking for up for trade. This guy wanted the card 'Genesis' so I decided to make a video game system pun.

What's my age again?

With a donkey’s jawbone

Quick bible update, I've cruised through Joshua and Judges now. Here's some of my favorites:

"Then Samson said,

   'With a donkey’s jawbone
   I have made donkeys of them.
With a donkey’s jawbone
   I have killed a thousand men.'"

Judges 15:16

"Then Joshua said to Achan, "Why have you brought trouble on us? The LORD will now bring trouble on you." And all the Israelites stoned Achan and his family and burned their bodies."

Joshua 7:25

"Then they burned the whole city and everything in it, but they put the silver and gold and the articles of bronze and iron into the treasury of the LORD’s house."

Joshua 6:24

"They devoted the city to the LORD and destroyed with the sword every living thing in it—men and women, young and old, cattle, sheep and donkeys."
Joshua 6:21




For comparison, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pfevBIsVG1o

God, Magic, Fire, Drew and Exotic Lands

More bible coming soon. I've actually got through Genesis with commentary and after that I started straight up reading and I'm currently half way through Deuteronomy. I still can't believe how stupid the bible is. There's a section where God is telling Moses how to build some sort of worship tent where they can sacrifice goats and shit that goes on for pages and pages (Exodus 25-40, TWENTY FIVE THROUGH FORTY.) I can't write commentary because it's literally just tent construction. I might as well comment on the instructions for an erector set. My favorite and, I think most telling, is the many multiple times God punishes the Israelites for doubting him. To be fair they do act incredibly dumb, they doubt this gods existence after they literally heard him talking to them like a week earlier. God punishes them by making them all walk around in the desert until their whole generation is dead. Commit thoughtcrime and God will fucking kill you.

I won a magic tournament last friday. So far I've been kicking ass at Innistrad drafts, every one I've entered I've either won or finished in the money. This game is finally really starting to come together for me. By nature, I'm not that competitive a guy but there is an exception to that. The better I get at something, the more I want to win. This only shows in a couple areas of my life: select video games, at work and now competitive magic. I'm hoping to get out to higher level tournament sometime, and I want to keep improving my game. I'm playing to win here!

A girl got fired at work the other day, the same awkward "Deuceaholic" I mentioned earlier. I was surprised but when I thought about it I decided I was more surprised that I was surprised. I hadn't really been paying attention, but thinking back it was pretty easy to notice she had been working on the same generic thing for over a month or so. She also didn't hide it very well when she was slacking, once she spent a solid 30 minutes at her desk fiddling with her magic deck (Note to self: don't do that.) She was an odd duck but also a good person, so I hope she landed on her feet. It's weird to see someone in your department get let go. It's like she died. We speak about her in hushed tones and if someone slips out one of her sayings we all clamor "Ooooooo, too soon."

I've never been more excited for a Drew album. The songs so far are "Gold Jerry, Gold!" at least in my own professional opinion. Some of them may be a little too much jaying off on our part but the whole band was very proud of Tonight, Tonight and Boys of Summer, even if they don't always make for the most comical of choices. The rest were all picked for their lyrics and work well. Baby made for a great single since it's so popular, easy to play and Jay knocked the Ludacris part out of the park. We only have a couple more songs to record and I have high hopes for all of them. The skits between songs make me bust up every time I hear them too. Me and Jay discussed the other day whether or not we'd be able to play a gig. If we had the time to prepare and practice, I really don't think it'd be out of the question. It's funny to think about what would've happened if all that Drewcifers energy was channeled into a functional band. All-in-all it makes me want to play more in general including writing some more songs or doing a couple songs for youtube.

Travel sounds appealing these days. I finally have the money to justify making long trips, the time is a much more scarce commodity and that's really where I have to save up. Budgeting my vacation days around Xmas this season is looking to be a challenge. I'm looking to hit an early tourney, visit the Joe, make my way back to cleveland for work and Jo'hearns Birthday party, get back to Dexter for family Xmas, and finally head to Canada for extended family Xmas. I'll admit to posting about the sugar bowl on hamtwitter as well but that's just a pipe dream (this year.) Whoever posted next was right, the time and money must be saved for HamFrance.

Damn Steven, go to bed it's like 2:30am.